Sunday, 3 June 2018


 Mark Johnson and I where fresh out of high school. We really

were unsure what we wanted to do once we graduated. There were

a lot options and none of them stuck out at us. Mark had

applied to several different collages, he never heard anything

back from them. Mark and I were hanging out over at the mall. 

 Mark went in to the outfitters store. This store had

everything any outdoorsy person could  ask for.

     Mark was one of 4 kids, both of his brother's had joined

the RCMP.
“, dude what kind of tent did your parents want you to pick up


“, It's the Coleman 8 person tent, Mark replied.”

“, it's this one right here.”

     Marks family loved being outdoors. I had gone camping with

them on the G.T trail last year.

     Mark grabbed the tent off the shelve. We started heading

towards the cashier. There wasn't much a selection, to chose

from. Of course they didn't have my size.

 “, what, I asked.”

“, Roller blades, really dude, Mark replied.”

“, I've always had a interest in inline skating, I said.”

“, I always thought you were a skate board kind of guy.”

“, nope more roller blading then anything else buddy.”

“, come on Mark you know I can skate like a pro.”

     Mark and I headed up to the second floor. The Military had

several tables set up in front of an empty store.

I had been thinking about joining the Military, after I had

graduated from high school. 

     I walked around the booth thinking this would be a cool job.

Training was 10 to 12 weeks long. But before  you could start

training you had  pass a physical.

“,  are you joining dude or what, I just signed up myself,

replied Mark.”

“, I'm thinking about it.”

     The more I thought about it, the more I  wanted to join the

Military. I Was starting to get hungry and I could hear Marks

tummy growling. Let me just say that when Mark gets hungry he

gets really grumpy.

“, excuse me sir, where do I sign up, I asked.”

“, Right over here.”

     I followed the recruiter in to empty store that they had set

up for those who where wanting to join the armed forces. These

guys took their jobs really seriously.

      Just like that I had joined the Military. This was one of the

biggest decision I had ever made in my life.

“, Well dude how did it go, Mark asked.”

“, it went grate they asked me all these questions, before I

knew it, I was signing on the dotted line, I replied.”

“, How is your bother Cody  going to react when he finds out

you joined the Military.”

 I never thought for one second how Cody and mom would react to

me joining the Military. I mean job is a job no matter what.

 As long as I can pay my bills and put food on the dinner


     Life was tough enough, people where losing their jobs and

others are losing their jobs to other countries.

     We headed to the food court to grab something to eat. I knew

what I was going to have, like always I headed right for


“, What are you in the mood for Mark.”

“, I was thinking burger king or getting something from

A&W,Mark said.”

“, I'll meet you over at those table by the door.”

     When I finally got my order, I headed over to the table where

 Mark was waiting.

“, Gee it took them long enough to make your sub, Mark said.”

“, they are just under staff today.”

“, interesting.”

     After we had finished eating lunch we headed back to

Mark's house so he could drop off the tent. Mark's parents had

their kitchen redone back in the winter time.

“, Hello, anybody home.”

“, Hey boy's, how was the mall this afternoon, Marks mom ask.”

“, It wasn't too busy today.”

     Mark and I went up to his room. I had to go to the washroom

really bad. Mark was in his room getting change before we

headed over to my house. I couldn't believe that Mark never

told his parents that he had joined the Military.

“, Hey Mark why didn't you tell your parents about you joining

the Military, I asked.”

“, I will before we leave to go to your house.”

“, cool,I replied.”

     I could tell that Mark was nervous about telling his parents

that he had joined the Military,  in all honesty, I think

his parents would be cool with it.

“, dude I will meet you down stair's.”

     I headed down stairs and poked my head in to the kitchen where

Mrs. Walker was baking. Marks house always smelt good, even

when Mrs. Walker wasn't baking cookies.

“, damn it smells good down here.”

“, Awe thank you honey, give me one second I have a plate of

cookies here for you, Mrs. Walker said.”

“, Thanks Mrs. Walker, I replied.”
 Mark came running down the stairs. He was whiter then a ghost.

Mark handed me his cell phone. I took a look at it, I knew by

the number Mark and I had either been excepted or rejected for

basic training.

     When I answered the phone the voice on the other end told me

that Mark and I had passed our physicals and we where cleared

for basic training.

“, Who was that on the phone, asked Mrs. Walker.”

“, It was the recruiting office Mrs. we've been excepted for

training, I replied.”

“, I'm vary proud of you boys.”

     It was hard on a lot of the guys out here.  They get called

 to serve their country. Only to be deployed to a country that 

could end their lives. The toughest part about being 40

thousand miles away from home. Some guys make do with cheating

on their wife's with some of the local's.

     I was sitting in my tent doing some paper work before my next

 shift. I hated the fact that I was behind, but the truth is after my shift is over, I'm just way to tired to think and

write what went down.

     While I was doing my paper work there was a sudden knock

on my door, not that my tent had a door to knock on, if you

get my point.

“, come in.”

“, excuse me sir, the general is here to see you.”

“, thank you PVT. Thomas, tell the general I'll be right in, I


  I finished my paper work and headed to my office I didn't

want to keep the general waiting.

     I walked in to my office and there was this uneasy feeling in

the air. Judging by the look on the generals face this wasn't

one of those lets shoot the breeze kind of chats. No this was

something happened and your ass is grass kind of talks.

“, Sorry for the wait sir, that picture your looking at is of

my youngest daughter riding her horse.”

“, She's a vary pretty Chris, let me cut right to the chase.

The reason why I'm here is to let you know that there have been

some concerns with the way your handling your teams missions.”

“, I can explain everything sir, the reason is sir, my guy are

over worked it's not safe. Most of my men are only getting a

hours sleep before they have to go back out on patrol sir.”

“, I see, so what can I do to fix this.”

“, Well sir I have some idea's that could fix this issue, the

other generals may not like it thou.”

“, I really don't care what they think, I'm the one who calls

 the shots around here not them.”

“, Yes sir, my idea is instead of having units pulling back to

back shifts with out any sleep, maybe there should be a

mandatory 9 hours off before that unit can go back out on

patrol, I said.”

“, I like the way you think Chris. How ever there is only one

problem with your idea.  The other side will advance if we

don't keep on top of them, the general said.”

“, Not really sir, if we keep the heat on by just constantly

putting units out in the field as other units are ending they

will have little chance to advance on us sir.”

“, Make sure you put that in your report. And Chris I don't

need to tell you to keep your units nose clean. Because if we

have any more problems, then there will be some  changes


     Before our next patrol started, I gathered  my guys together

and had it out with them in away that wasn't too condescending

. Up till this point I had never really had it out with my unit

since taking over the unit from a another commander who was

discharge for sexually assaulting another female officer.

     We gathered all in the mess tent. I begin telling them about

the meeting I just had with the general. Even though the

meeting was largely about me getting a rank change if things

didn't start improving. Some of the guys started shouting out

that the reason why things have been heated with in my ranks is

because of all the back to back patrols.

“, Okay guys listen up, the scoop is if you guys don't start

getting your ass's in gear, then are going to be some changes

in this unit, starting with my ass, as your commander.”

“, Your kidding right sir, the General won't fire your ass

for letting us have some fun, said PVT. Colin.”

“, I really wish I was kidding with you, but I'm not this

is the final notice, the general will fire me, I said.”

“, excuse me sir, not to be argumentative with you, I doubt the

general will fire your ass, said privet Chris.”

“,Well I hope that's the case, but just so you guys are aware

please for god sacks clean up your acts, I'm begging you.”

     I headed back to my tent and laid down on my bed thinking back

to what my younger brother Kyle said just before Mark and I

headed off for our basic training. I laid there with my eyes

closed I could hear Kyle's voice in my head saying Please don't

go! please don't go! over and over again. I could see the tears

pouring down the sides of Kyle's face as I got in to the cab

and headed for the bus station.

     Kyle's last words to me as the cab drove down our street where 

Andy I don't want you to die, Please don't go please don't go.

I looked back to see Kyle standing in the middle of the street

with moms wrapped around him pulling back towards our house as

the cab turned the corner. I sat quietly in the back seat with

my head down.

“, Andy you okay dude, asked Mark.”

“, yea man, I'll be alright once we get to Montreal, I

     The next day I woke to find a paper had been slid under my

tent door. I Picked up the paper and unfolded it and read what

was written on the paper. All I could read was Andy your

heading home for the Canada day long weekend, back your bags

and be at the Air base by 07 hundred.

     For the first time in 5 years I was going to be able to see my

younger brother Kyle, I couldn't wait. Word spreed through the

camp quickly of my leave for the long weekend. Most of the guys

where happy for me, while some of the other guys who I had gone

through the ranks with where told they were not going to be

heading home this time around. To be honest that's the only

thing that sucks about being in the Military is being told you

can't see your family after being apart from them for years at

a time.

     Once my bags where packed I headed down the path to a near by

Jeep that was waiting to take me to the air base where I was

going to be flying out of. What I didn't expect was this to be

my final ride and the last time I would see any of my men.

     I was sitting in my bedroom doing my home work when I heard

mom scream at the top of her lungs. I knew from the sound that

who ever had just called the news wasn't good news. I went down

to the landing and all I saw was mom sitting on the floor

holding the phone to her chest crying Andy no please tell me

this is not happening. It was then I put 2 and 2 together and

thought to myself no this can't be right Andy was heading home

there's no way, they have gotten the wrong number.

     I sat for a minute and then there was a knock at the door, mom

got up off the floor, she opened the door and there standing

there was the Chaplin for the Military and Andy's commanding

officer. Just what I didn't want to hear coming from Andy

commanding officer, “, I'm sorry to have to inform you of the

news but I'm to let you know that Andy was killed earlier today

on his way back to the air base, said the commanding officer.”

     I just sat in shock while my parents hugged one another

tightly in grief.
“, Kyle go to your room, please, my dad said.”

“, dad is Andy alright, I asked.”

“, Kyle please don't make me ask you again, go to your room,

I'll explain later.”

     I headed back up and went right for Andy's bedroom. I closed

the door behind me, and sat on his bed with his picture held

tightly to me chest. I could barely speak a word but some how I

was able to look at his picture.

“, why Andy why did you have to die like this, I cried out at

his picture.”

“, please come home to me please come home to me I kept saying

in a raspy voice.”

     That night my parents and I cried our self's to sleep over the

death of my older brother Andy.
     A week later our city came to a complete stand still as my

brother Andy's body was brought home. The drive from the

airport was the long's ride of my life. I watched as people

lined the street's of our city waving Canadian flags and

signing the national anthem as Andy's body passed by.

     From fire fighters to police our motorcade was either cheered

or saluted in a show of thanks and respect for my brother

Andy's duty and service to his country. 3 days later Andy was

given a regimental funeral. The only way I knew how to horror

my brother was to walk behind his flag draped coffin to the St.

James Cathedral church.
     3 year's later I graduated from high school. I found myself

sitting in the same office as my brother Andy once sat when he

decided to serve his country. I guess you can say I'm following

in my big brother's shoes. But all I'm really doing is going on

a mission to find the heartless coward who stole my brother

away from me 3 years ago.  










Bragging Rights

Some people say if you look closely you can still see the

Bluenose, has She sailed across the ocean. Her mast blowing in

wind as she sailed through the water's of the North Atlantic. 

The Bluenose was at the top of her game. She had won all of her

races that year. Then it happened the Bluenose was challenge by 

the United States. Either way this race was for all the

bragging rights. The Bluenose to her credit already had a

large following.

     I can still remember when Skipper Angus Walter's

found out the United States had challenge the Bluenose, to

a race across the North Atlantic. For the first time our small

crew of 20 had to put our beloved fisherman's trophy on the


I was the newest crew member on the Bluenose. I was at the

bottom of the totem poll. So I had very little in put when it

came to making suggestions. I had learned early on from my dad

that some team's  would do anything to win a race even it met

racing dirty. Other teams would argue the outcome of the race

after words because there was something about the United States

time that never added up. But to avail the United States would

walk away with another win under their belt. The crew on the

Bluenose was also known for racing dirty but Angus Walters

made sure it fell within the rules of the race.

“, Skipper on deck, yelled Paul who was the second officer.”

“, sir welcome aboard, your crew is all counted for , Paul


“, Very well, make sure to send the rookie to my cabin, replied

the Skipper.”

     For whatever reason's Paul didn't much care for me. Paul

never liked the fact I was brought aboard by my friend who was

also member of the crew. My sister Natalie was right about

Paul, he was vary insecure. That night I headed home from the

harbour. I was standing by my car having a quick smoke. Out of

nowhere asked me if he could bum a smoke off me.  I reached in

to my right pocket and pulled out my smokes and handed him one.

 “, thanks dude, the guy said as he walked away.”

I tossed my smoke on the ground, and headed home. When I got

home mom told me that there was message for me Paul.

“, Mom when this message left for me, I asked.”

“, Paul called about hour ago, while you were on your way

home, mom said.”

“, did he say what it was about, I said.”

“, no! My mom replied.”

“, did Paul leave his number for me to call him back, I asked.”

“, I wrote it down on the back of the paper, mom replied.”

     I went up stairs to my room and called Paul back. I got no

answer so I hung up. I laid down my bed with my head resting up

against the wall. I had no idea why paul called the house. My

first thought was that something had happened to the skiper and

Paul wanted me to come in.

“, Kevin you have a phone call, Natalie yelled.”

“, who it is, I asked.”

“, It's Paul, he say's it's really importent, replied


“, hold on let me grab my phone.”

“, okay got it, I yelled down the stairs.”

I took 2 deep breaths in and out before I said anything. 

“, Hello.”

“, Kevin it's Paul.”

“, hey Paul what can I do for you, I replied.”

“, What did that guy ask you in the parking lot earlier tonight

Paul asked.”

“, am I in trouble.”

“, no you’re not in trouble, what did he say to you

 asked Paul.”

“, All he asked is if he could bum a smokr off me, I said.”

“, what did you tell him Kevin, asked Paul.”

“, I said yes, I replied.”

“, okay thanks for taking my call Kevin, I'll see you tomorrow,

Paul said.”

     I went to bed after I was done talking to Paul. Something

told me that I was going to be on the hot seat in the morning.

As much as I hated Paul I really didn't care if he put on the

hot seat in the morning for giving the guy a smoke in the

parking lot.

     I finally drifted off to sleep shortly after 2am. I woke up 

just before 6am. I went to the washroom, had a quick

shower then headed down stiars to make coffee. I had a gut

feeling that today was going to be one of those days where Paul

would find a reason to put me in the hot seat.

     In any case I think it buggs Paul that I can play his game

just as good as he can. Only thing is I don't need to kiss the

Skipers ass.  Natalie woke up just shortly after 7am.

“, Kevin can you make me some french toast please, asked


“, I guess I make you french toast sis, I replied.”

     I walked out of the livingroom and in to the kitchen.

Natalie loved french toast with lots of blueberrys on top.

I made sure that every inch of the bread was covered with

blueberrys. While I was making Natalie's breakfast I turned on

the tv in the kitchen. The local news was talking about the

Americans challanging the Bluenose to a race. What caught my

attantion was the grand prize of $4,000 dollars. Which at that 

time was a good chunk of money. I didn't hear Natalie come down

the stairs until she was standing behind me in the kitchen.

“, Kevin is everything okay, Natalie asked.”

“, Sorry here's your french toast,I said.”

“, are you ok.”

“, Yea I'm fine. Do you need a ride to school.”

“, No dad is driving me to school this morning, Natalie


     The phone rang as I was walking out the door. Natalie

came running after me with the phone in her hand.

“, Kevin Paul is on the phone.”

“, god damn it,I said as I got out of the car.”

“, Paul what's up, I said.”

“, hey Kevin, I hate asking you to do this, can you come in

at noon today, Paul asked.”

“, sure, I replied.”

“, grate see you at noon, Paul said.”

     I got out of my car and headed back in to the house. I sat

down at the kitchen table where Natalie was eatting her french

toast. I got up and walked over to the toaster and made me a

bagle. Dad came walking in to the kitchen  made himself a quick

cup of coffee.

“, lets go kiddo, don't wanna be late this morning, dad said.”

     I went in to the living room and laid on the couch for

a bit before I had to head in to work. Paul has never 

called to ask me to come in at noon before.

     I started to wander what Paul was going to blame me for

this time. Maybe I didn't fold the towls right or maybe there

was a spoon in the sink and Paul wanted the skiper to fire me

for leaving it in the sink.


     I parked my car in my usual spot under the old oak tree. I

Walked up the ramp and Paul was standing just inside the


“, hey Kevin, thank you so much for coming in at noon

today, Skiper said.”

“, no problem. So what can I do for you sir, I asked.”

“, I need you to mop the forward well deck,  vacum the briage

 please and thank you, the skiper asked.”

     By the end of the day, I was so tired I could barly keep my

eyes open on the drive home from the harbour.

     I woke up the next morning, hopped in to the shower. I

went down stairs to myself some peanut butter toast. I made

 a pot of coffee, there's nothing like a good ol' cup of java first thing in the morning, to kick start ones brain.

“, is that coffee I smell, yelled dad from the top of stairs.”

“, yupper, I yelled back.”

“, oh god that's good stuff. Thanks for the coffee, dad said.”

“, your welcome, dad replied.”

     Normally when dad would walk in to the kitchen he would fly

over to the kitchen counter poor himself a cup of coffee, then

he would leave out the back door.

     Dad came back in to the kitchen. I was sitting at the

kitchen table reading the news paper. I looked up and

 dad standing there looking at me.

“, is there something I can do for you dad, I asked.”

“, Kevin can you drive Natalie to school this morning, dad


“, sure dad.”

“, Son what are the chances of your mother and I getting a pair

of ticket's to your race next weekend, dad asked with a smile.”

“, I'll have to ask the skipper, I replied.”

“, thanks son, dad said.”

     Okay that whole talk with dad just now was really creepy, I

thought to myslef as I went back to reading the morning paper.

Natalie came walking in to the kitchen and sat at the table.

“, hey kev, is dad alright, she asked.”

“, yea he's fine, I said.”

 “, I'm going to go grab a shower, I'll be ready in 10 minutes,

Natalie replied.”

“, sounds good, I said.”

     I finished my coffee and went outside to warm up the car.

while Natalie was in shower. A few minutes later Natalie

came out the back door with her backpack wide open.

“, whats the hurry sis, I asked.”

“, I'm 5 minutes late for school.”

“, yea so, I replied.”

“, it might not be a big deal to you, but it's a big deal to

me, Natalie replied.”

“, by the way your backpack is open, I said.”

“, damn it, thanks kev for letting me know.”

     When I got to work, Angus Walters was quick to put me 

to work below deck. I cleaned all the bathrooms and did

a quick once over of the gallyway before heading back up to the

deck. I didn't want to miss any of the action that was about to

take place. The Bluenose was defending her tittle.

      The crew of the Bluenose defeated the Americans in a time

of 3 minutes and 29 seconds, to re take the fishermans trophy.

     It seemed like everything was starting to go our way. How

ever Angus Walters was having trouble finding people to fund

the Bluenose for another year of race's.

     4 months had past since the Bluenose defeated the


Angus Walters was still having trouble finding money to keep

the Bluenose in Nova Scotia. Then the unthinkable happened

Angus Walters who had been the only skiper of the Bluenose

schooner was forced to sale the Bluenose.

     In 1937, the Bluenose became a symbolic gesture of Canada,

when it would be place on the 10 cent coin. After all these

years I still find myself laying on my pillow thinking about

the glory that the Bluenose schooner brought to Nova Scotia. In

some respects I don't blame skiper Angus Walters for saling the


     On January,29, 1946 the once famouse Bluenose hit a reef

just off the coast of Haiti and sank to her wattery grave.

Today the Bluenose is  one of Canada's most iconic fishing



     July 24, 1963 buliders Smith & Rhuland would begain work on

a 2nd schooner that would be called the Bluenose 2. The Bluenose

2 would be built from the same plans as the first Bluenose.

Every detail would be identical to the origanal Bluenose

schooner that was built back in 1921. Today the Bluenose 2

travles all over the world with other tall boats.

     I would make it a point to take my grand kids to see the

tall ships when they would sail in to Nova Scotia's harbour.

The kids would make it a point to ask me what it was like

working on the first Bluenose back in the day.

     I would always smile when the kids would ask me to tell

them about my time as a lonely deckhand. But one thing I always

make sure my grandkids know was how man made the Bluenose what

she is today. A National symbol of our grate country.

     In 1971 the Bluenose 2 become Nova Scotia's sailing

ambassador. A tittle befitting of a grate symbolic fishing

schooner. Today the Bluenose is maned by a crew of 5 officers,

chief cook, 12 deckhands.  






Josh & Cody fight

“, Alright let's start from the beginning shell we, Principle

Mike Hopkins said.”

“, I was standing over the gym door's when Cody came up behind

me and punched me, I said.”

“, What ever Josh, you know that's not true, Cody replied.”

“, Hey keep quiet Josh, Mike said slamming his hand on his


“, but sir, Cody lying to you, like he always does, Josh said.”

“, Why don't you let me decide that for myself, hows that

sound, Mike said.”

     One of the longest days of life took place in Principle

Mike Hopkins office, has Cody and I sat there arguing over who

started a fight on the playground 3 months ago. I don't

remember much about the fight. But from what I heard in the

halls, is that I took one hell of beating at the hands of Cody

and his 2 other friends.

     All I know is that the fight some how got started when one

of Cody's friends told Cody that I was screwing around with his

girlfriend and one thing lead to another and a fight broke out

during gym class on the playground. I hate to say it but Cody

has poor taste in girls. I don't know how anyone could find

such a fugly looking girl, who had been beaten with an ugly

stick more then once in her life time.

“, Last time I'm telling you to be quiet Josh, Mike replied

pointing his finger at me.”

“, continue Cody, Principle Mike said.”

“, One of my friends came up to me during the afternoon break

and told me that Josh had been making move's on my girlfriend,

so I went up to Josh to ask him about it, Cody said.”

“, Nice lie asshole, I said.”

“,You wanna go right now Josh, because you know I'll kick your

ass again, Cody said kicking his chair.”

“, come on asshole let's go right now, oh wait your loser

friends aren't here to help your fugly ass out again, I replied 

pushing my chair.”

     Needless to say nothing got resolved that afternoon in

Mike's office. I walked out the front doors of the school and

headed for the parking lot where my dad was waiting for me. At

one point my principle and my dad even got in to a fight back

when they where kids. Too this vary day they still don't like

one another all that much.

     Cody came running out of the gym door's, as he tried to cut

me off from getting to the parking lot.


“, MAKE ME!, Cody replied.”

     I started to clinch my fist, just as my dad and principle

Mike came walking out of the parking lot. Cody and I where

right in each other face. We stared at each other for a few

seconds then Cody started backing away.

“, YAH! Walk away like a little pussy, I said.”

“, what did you just call me, Cody replied.”

“, you fucking heard me, your a pussy, just  like your

girlfriend is, I repeated.”

“, Make me, Cody said.”

     Cody took one swing just missing the side of my face. I

then swung back at Cody connecting right in his jaw breaking it

in 2 spots. Cody drooped to the ground like a load of bricks

falling off the back of a pick up truck. I stood over Cody

yelling at him to get up.

“, come on tough guy get up and fight me, I said ripping his

jacket off.”

“, Josh knock it off, and get your ass in the car now, my dad

yelled out.”

     Just before I let go of Cody, I made sure I got one last

shot in on him while he was down, just to make a point. I gave

Cody one good kick in the ribs just to add insult to injury. As

I walked to the car which was parked just at the entrance of

the teacher's parking lot, I notice Cody's fugly girlfriend

giving me the stink eye.

“, YOUR NEXT BITCH, I yelled.”

“, SHUT THE FUCK UP JOSH, Kristen shouted back.”

“, BITE ME WHORE, I yelled back.”

     I got in to my dad's car and sat in the front seat looking

straight ahead. My dad's body language spoke loud and clear,

that he was pissed off with me.

“, Wanna explain all that bull shit to me Josh, my dad said.”

“, NO! Not really, I replied.”

“, that's fine then, consider your ass grounded for the next 3

months. Also your computer and cell phone are also gone, do I

make myself clear, my dad said smacking the steering wheel.”

“, what the fuck dude, I need my computer and cell phone for my

home work dad, come on.”

“, Next time you'll think before you do something as stupid as

fighting on school grounds, my dad said.”

     The car ride home was anything but quiet, my dad and I

where having it out. This was not normal for my dad and I we

hardly ever fought with each other. Most of the time I would

always fight with my step mom who also was a real bitch and

still is to this day. Granted that she royally fucked my dad

over in so many ways it wasn't funny. But that's besides the

point. My dad clearly angry with me and the fact that I would

get in to 3 fights with the same kid. That was fine with me but

honestly it took Cody and his 2 friends to beat me up. I only

needed a left hook and a solid right kick to Cody's rib cage to

prove I could kick Cody's ass.   

“, dad all I'm saying is that it took 3 guys to beat the shit

outta me, where it only took one left hook and a good swift

kick the rib cage to knock out that dumb fuck, I said.”

“, Josh just stop. Nothing you say will get your computer back

or your cell phone back and your ass is still grounded for 3


     I slammed the car behind me and walked in to the house. I

went right to my room and slammed the door. I laid on my bed

staring up at my ceiling. There was knock on my bedroom door, I

put my head phones on so I couldn't hear who ever was knocking

at my door. The door opened and my step mom walked in to room,

I just laid there looking at my ceiling.

“, Hey Josh, can we talk for a bit, she asked.”

“, knock your self out, but don't expect me to listen to your

ass, I replied.”

“, Look Josh, I know you don't like me and I can respect that.

All I'm trying to do is help you.”

“, how are you helping my ass. Your ripping us off by pwning

all of our stuff plus you sold my moms jewelry for fuck sake's,

I replied.”

“, okay yes I screwed up, but that doesn't mean you can treat

me like shit Josh, Kim said.”

“, Sorry I don't much care for people who think they can just

sale someone else personal belonging's to whom ever they

please, I said slamming my fist on my bed.”

“, Well I'm sorry you feel that way about me Josh, I really am,

Kim said as she walked out of the room.”

     I just laid in my bed, even more angry then I was when I

got home. The fact that my step mom thought that some how she

could just come in to my bedroom and cheer me up, boy was she

wrong. I got up and went down stair's I needed some air. My dad

made it a point to remind me that I was grounded and couldn't

hang out with any of my friends. As far as I was concerned I

had no friends.

     I heard Kim say something as I walked out the front door

and sat on the front step. The door opened and sure enough my

step mom from hell walked out and stood behind me, breathing

down the back of my neck.

“, What the fuck do you want now, I said.”

“, Can you please stop swearing, it really bothers me

that you talk to me like I'm trash.”

“, Don't see how that's my problem, I'm not that who fucked

their boss, I replied.”  

“, Alright I admit it Josh, I'm nothing more then a slut, does

that make you feel better, Kim said.”

“, Jesus Christ Kim leave me the fuck alone, is that asking to

much to ask, I yelled.”

     I got up and went back inside the house. My dad was

standing in the kitchen door way when I came storming in the

house. I looked at my dad and just shook my head, then went

back up to my room with out saying a word to him. I could hear

my dad asking Kim what in the hell was going on. Kim told my

dad that she was only trying to have a friendly conversation

with me on the front porch.

“, Kim why can't you leave Josh a lone when he is in a bad

mood, why, my dad asked.”

“, Because maybe I care about Josh just as much as you do and I

wanna have a relationship with him, but he keeps pushing me

away, Kim said.”

“, I know you do, I know you do, my dad replied.”

     For what it was worth, I had to give Kim credit for trying

to talk to me about everything that was going on between me and

that Jack ass Cody. I was laying on my bed just staring up at

the ceiling when all of a sudden I thought to myself maybe Kim

is the one person I can get to understand what's really going

down between Cody and I. After all Cody and I did hide our gay

relationship from everyone. Now Cody and I just wanted to rip

each others thought's out.

     I got up off my bed and walked towards my bedroom door. I

stopped myself from opening it. I stood there for a minute or

two with my back ageist the door. As I stood there I could hear

footsteps coming up the stairs. They stopped short of my

bedroom door. I kept my ear as close to my door as I could get

it. I knew by the sound of the foot steps who they belong to

and there was no way I was going to let Cody get the jump on me

I was good and ready for him. I reached over and grabbed my

baseball bat and held it in my left hand as I opened my bedroom


“, What the fuck are you doing in my house Cody,I asked.”

“, I just wanna talk man to man, Cody replied.”

“, yeah right, I'm not that stupid Cody, put down your led pipe

and then maybe I'll come out and talk to you, I said.”

“, Josh I'm unarmed trust me, just come out of your room and

let's talk, Cody said.”

“, Okay go wait on the landing for me, I said.”

“, Come on Josh stop wasting time, just come out of your room

please I'm begging you man to man, Cody replied.”

     I opened my bedroom door just a crack and looked out in the

both directions to make sure Cody wasn't trying to get me to

fall in to one of his traps. I turned and looked towards the

landing where Cody was standing.

“, What the fuck do you want Cody, I said.”

“, I just wanna work things out with you I'm tired of fighting

all the time, Cody said.”

“, Then why don't you start talking instead of just standing

there looking like a pathetic Jack ass, I replied.”

“, Can we talk in your bedroom Josh, Cody said.”

“, What ever it is you have to say you can say it right here in

the hallway, I replied.”

“,I'd rather not say what I have to say right here, where our

parents could hear, Cody said.”

     I let out a deep breath then looked at Cody.

“, okay but you better make this quick because right now I just

wanna beat the living day light's out of you, I said.”

     We walked in to my room. I have to admit I really wanted to

beat Cody over the head with my baseball bat. AS much as I

wanted to do this act of murder to Cody, I heard this little

voice in my head saying just hear him out. The other little

voice in my head said if you like what Cody says then just slam

the baseball bat over his head.

“, Okay talk, I said crossing my arms.”

“, look Josh I don't want to fight anymore I just wanna be able to move on with my life, Cody said.”

“, So then why start shit that you can't finish Cody, I asked.”

“, I always finish what I start Josh you know that, Cody


“, Is that why you need your buddy's to help knock my ass out,

I said.”

“, Those guys are not my buddy's and for your information they

jumped in on our fight, Cody said.”

“, Sure they did, I replied.”

     Cody let out a deep breath and just looked at me like he

wasn't getting any where. I looked back at him with a dirty

look. I had so many different thoughts running through my mind

of how I could hurt Cody really badly to the point that he

would never be able to walk again, or at least close to it.

“, Alright I see we are never going to be able to work this

problem out between us. Maybe I should just go, Cody said.”

“, Where the fuck do you think your going, I said.”

“, I'm leavening, your not interested in talking to me, Cody


“, No your not, your going to sit the fuck down and your going

to listen to me now, I said pointing to my desk chair.”

     Cody stopped just in between the door and the hallway. He

stood there for a moment or two just looking at the stair case.

Cody came back in to my room and closed the door behind him.

He walked slowly over to my desk and sat down in the chair.

“, what do you want to say, Cody said with a wispy voice.”

“, All I want to say is that all this fighting we have been

doing and trying to rip each other apart is not getting us

anywhere. So what I'm thinking is maybe we just stay away from

each other from now on, maybe one day we could be friends again

, Cody said.”

“, SO what are you saying Cody, your giving up, I asked.”

“, basically I'm not going to fight you anymore and I just want

all these hard feeling's that we have for one another to just

go away, Cody replied.”
     In all honesty what Cody offered actually made a lot of

senses and I quickly realized that I was in favor of his idea.

That night Cody and I shook hands. Cody turned and walked out

of bedroom with out saying a word. I stood there and watch as

Cody and his dad left. Cody made no eye contact has he walked

out the front door. For the first time in my life I had lost a

friend that I once respected. Now I wouldn't even give Cody the

shirt off my back if he beg me for it.

     Thing's got a lot better at school and with Cody getting

transferred to another school, there was a more relaxed

feeling and I started to like school again.