Sunday, 3 June 2018

Under the fan

Brad and I went out for a couple of drinks at the Rain tavern

which was High Rivers one and only gay bar. Some would say that

Brad and I are couple, but honestly there is no attraction

there and plus we have different tastes in guys. At times we

did think about getting together and trying to make a go of it.

The only thing is that it felt so strange that either of us

wanted to make a move on the other. Sure Brad was a vary hot

guy in his own right and he could have any guy he wanted. In

high school Brad was our high school football teams quarter

back and one of the most popular guys in school.

     What's even more funny is that Brad could have had any friends

he wanted in high school but instead he for some reason decided

to hang around with a loser like me. It really didn't help at

all that most time's brad would just leaving hanging when we

would get to school, to go hang with the popular crowd while I

just went and stood on the wall by the lockers and waited for

the bell to ring.

     I was standing at the bar waiting to get served by the hot bar

tender who Brad at one point had hooked up with for a brief

time. I had always known they had something going on, but I

could never figure it out what they saw in one another they to

were so opposite of one another that they must had been just

hooking up when they needed to get a little action.

     Damn there were a lot of cuties out at the bar tonight, the

guy sitting across from where I was standing was god if only I

could get him for a night the things I would do with him i

couldn't even put down in a book, well that is if I where

writing a book. After waiting for what felt like 5 minutes I

finally got to place our order. Brad and I had a simple order

which was 2 draft beers and 2 shots of wild cherry. I don't

what it is about a good draft beer and a fruity shot, but damn

that combo just seemed to work well together.

“, Whats the hold up, did you get our drinks yet, asked Brad.”

“, the bar tender is just making them now, I had to wait like 5

minutes while he served the other side.”

“, who's tending the bar tonight anyways.”

“, Tygil is tending the bar tonight, that explains the hold up,

Brad replied.”

“, there you go 2 draft beers 2 shots that's 9.50 please, said


     I placed a twenty dollar bill on the counter and looked behind

me and Brad was chatting with other guys at our table where we

normally sit. Tygil gave me my change and I was about to walk

away when he grabbed my arm.

“, what the hell, I almost split the drinks, I said.”

“, Hey are you and Brad dating or are you guys just like

friends and what not.”

“, we're just friends, why, I asked.”

“, no reason was just wandering I've seen you guys here a lot

of the last few months, thought you guys where dating, Tygil


“, not a chance there's no attraction between Brad and I.”

“, cool, well have a fun tonight.”

“, I will.”

     I headed back over to our table and put the drinks down. I

pulled Brad away from the table over to where we could be alone

so I could tell him what the bar tender asked me.

“, what the hell are you doing Hank, what's up.”

“, when I was coming back to our table with our drinks the bar

tender grabbed my arm and was asking me all kinds of questions

about us.”

“, like what kind of questions about us exactly was he asking.”

“, he was asking me if we were a couple and asking if we were

dating and all this kind of stuff.”

“, son of a bitch, I'm going to kick his ass, he knows better

then to ask you those kinds of questions.”

     I could see it Brad's face that he was really pissed about the

bar tenders questions about us. When Brad gets angry normally

someone is getting hurt really badly.

     This wouldn't be the first time that Brad and the bar tender

had a go around with one another, the last time Brad got his

ass handed to him because he used 3 rum bottles to his own

advantage to knock Brad out. This time was going to be

different. Brad knew people who could do some shit that even

others would never do in the light of day. Brad had all kinds

of connections to the underground world and to gangs that most

people would never want to hang around but in some ways these

groups where protection for us.

     Before I could tell Brad don't do anything stupid, he was gone

in a blink of an eye. Brad was heading up to the bar to have

words with the bar tender who Brad at one point had hook up

with to confront him about his questions to me.

“, what can I get for you, asked the bar tender.”

“, how about the the little fucker over there, for starters.”

“, hold on one second, replied the bar back.”

“, Brad come on you don't have to do this it was nothing he

didn't mean anything by asking me those questions just forget

about it.”

“, No Hank you can't let these kinds of jerks walk all over you

like that. It's just wrong you know it and I know it.”

“, What do you want Brad, if your looking for fight it's not

going to happen, said Tygil.”

“, You think I'm looking for a fight that depends on how to

answer my question now doesn't it.”

“, What's your question, make it quick because I have lot to do


“, Why did you ask my friend if we were dating, what gives you

know my friend here is like a little brother to me.”

“, I was just wander if you guys where going out that's all it

was a harmless question and I didn't mean anything by it, said


“, your lucky my friend stopped me from kicking your ass

tonight because if he wasn't here I would have done it.”

     Brad turned and walked away from the bar. I looked at the bar

tender with a puzzled look on my face. If I had known the

question Tygil asked me where going to piss brad off i would

have never even told him. In away I felt bad, because in all

honesty Tygil met nothing when he asked me that question.

“, come on Hank let's go back to our table and try to have a go

time now, with our that shit head trying to wreck our


“, hold the phone what do you mean by that brad, how was he

trying to wreak our friendship, I asked.”

“, Look Hank ever since I hooked up with that loser he has done

nothing but try and get between us. For what ever reason that

ass-wipe doesn't want us hanging around one another and it bugs

the holly shit out of me.”

“, sorry was just asking didn't mean to piss you off buddy, I


“, don't worry about it, let's just try and have fun okay.”

“, Oh my god come they are playing Cher, come on Hank we have

lets go bust a move on the dance floor.”

“, I can't dance if my life depended on it. I can barely hold a

beat long enough that doesn't sound like a cat getting run over 

by a dump truck.”

     Watching Brad on the dance floor made me wander why he got so

pissed off at Tygil for asking me if Brad and I were

boyfriends. I mean inn away the question was harmless and yes

it did catch me off guard a bit, but it actually felt really

nice to have been asked.

“, Hank get your skinny little butt on the dance floor and

dance with me, I fell like such a dork out here by myself.”

“, no thanks I'm enjoying the view from right here, plus your

doing a really good job at looking like a dork out there.”
“, thanks pal, your such a good friend, Brad said.”

     I went back to our table and sat down while Brad was out on

the dance floor getting groped by every guy in the joint. I

couldn't be caught dead dancing to a Cher song, there's just no

way in hell. Now if the DJ played Elton Johns Don't let the sun

go down on me then maybe I would get on the dance floor and be

just a dorky as Brad was being out there.

     There was something about Brad that would draw all these guys

to him no matter where we went, Brad was always the centre of

attention. There was no question about it he was after all one

of the hottest guys I had ever known. Not forgetting that he

was hanging out with a nerd.

“, Hey how come you didn't join me on the dance floor Hank is

something wrong.”

“, No there's nothing wrong, I just didn't feel like getting up

to dance, I replied.”

     By 1:45 in the morning the bar tender who was a real ass hole

called out last call. Brad and I ran up to the bar and grabbed

for drinks each that way we could continue to drink well after

2 in the morning. I guess in a way you could say that Brad and

I did this just to prove that we  were even bigger ass holes

then the bar tender was, but hey we were paying customers

and there was nothing the bar tender could do about it.

     Brad and I always stayed until lights out. The staff were

just about to lock the doors, that was our queue to leave.

“, Let's go back to your house Hank, that way we can hang in

your room and you can help me study for finals.”

“, I guess we can go back to my house, last we did my dad ended

up kicking you out for being to loud, Hank replied.”

“, You have my word I won't make any loud noises and I won't

even breath.”

     Brad and I sat outside on the steps of the bar. We where both

fairly drunk from our 4 hours of partying. We sat there

for several minutes taking in the early morning air. A cool

breeze blew through the trees while Brad and I continued to sit

there laughing at the random est of thing's.

“, what are we even laughing at I asked.”

“, I have no idea, that's what makes it funny, Brad replied.”

“, Yes hi, can I get a cab to the corner of 95th and 67th ave.

Pleases. My name is Hank, thank you.”

     A short time later our cab pulled up in front of the bar. Brad

took one look at the driver,and busted out laughing.

“, whats so funny, asked the driver.”

“, you have a towel on your head, Brad replied.”

“, yea so, and your wearing a paper bag on your head.”

“, hey don't make fun of my new hat.”

     I couldn't believe what I was hearing coming from Brads mouth

he had just made fun of a symbolic head dress that is commonly

worn by middle eastern men. Luckily for us the cab driver still

drove us home after Brads insults and untimely pointing out

that the guy was wearing a towel around his head.

“, I'm so sorry about my friend here, please excuse him he's

just really drunk.”

“, no worries sir, I'll get you and your friend home safe

and sound.”

“, So we are heading to 164 George street south.”

“, sir you said south correct, the cab asked.”

“, that's correct sir.”

     I had never been asked about my address and if it was the

correct one by any cab driver. I was taken back by our driver's

questions. At the same time it was like he thought Brad and I

were going to rob him or something.

turned on his GPS and started putting in my address while he

continued to ask questions about who was living at this

address. By this point I felt uneasy about going any further

with this cabby. On the other hand I really didn't want to wait

another 26 minutes for a different cab to show up.

“, I don't mean any disrespect sir, but your making me really

uneasy with all of your questions regarding my address.”

“, sir I'm only asking these questions is because last week I

was lead to a place that doesn't exist anymore, and I was


“, I'm sorry hear that, I hope you were not hurt in any way.”

“, I wasn't hurt but I was really shaken up by it, the driver


“, well being cab a driver is really a thankless job and

somebody has to do it. I mean I know I could never do your job

I would be freaking out all the time thinking I'm going to be

robbed at some point.”

“, Well sir that's something I try not to think about, the

driver replied.”

     We made it home just after 2:45 in the morning. Brad had

passed out in the back of the taxi cab. There was no way in

hell I was going to be able to carry him up the front steps and

in to the house. Some how I was able to wake Brad up, just long

enough till we made it through the front door of my house.

     I helped Brad over to the couch and he passed out yet again.

But not before Brad deiced to let all of that days food out all

over the side of my parents new leather lazy boy couch. 

“, That's just grate Brad you just barfed all over my parents

new couch, I said quietly.”

“, Don't worry about they won't ever know, I will clean it up

in the morning, Brad slurred.”

     I walked in to the kitchen and grabbed one of the big pots

that my mom used to make her famous chili in, just in case he

wanted to throw up in to the pot instead of down the front of

my parents new couch.

     I reached under the counter and grabbed a few cleaning

products that my mom had used on the couch a few days earlier

and I started to wipe off all the barf that was running down

the side of our couch.

     After I was done wiping all of Brad's barf off the couch, I

sat on the floor just watching him sleep. For the first time in

my young life I knew deep down that I was madly in love with my

best friend. Nothing else mattered to me at the moment. The

only thing that I cared about was the hot hunk that was passed

out on my parents couch snoring away, like there was not a care

in the world.

     I sat on the couch beside Brad and laid down next to him, with

his arm wrapped tightly around me. I could hear the beating

sound of our hearts as we lay there under the fan.





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